Washington or Bust!

Bank of America, General Motors, Citibank, and Siskin Valls—all American corporations doing their best in this strained economic time. Somehow I just don’t see Siskin Valls as a viable candidate for an economic bailout. If wrong, however, I have learned a thing or two if asked to plead my case before Congress. Firstly I will definitely not take my private plane to Washington. I’m thinking about thumbing a ride, dressed in chic but ragged clothes, and carrying my few items in a sack tied around a stick carried over my shoulder. I will explain to the congressional committee that I have suspended my multi-million dollar bonus this year and my only compensation will be the satisfaction I get from the joy and pleasure on my clients’ faces. I will go on to explain that Brokeback Manor, upon my death, will be turned into the Old Age Home for Retired Decorators. Add a few bathroom grab bars and wheelchair accessible doors and it will be perfect.

Washington or Bust!

I have been thinking of other ways to supplement my income and increase my business. Unfortunately there wasn’t a course in this at Parsons School of Design, but I do have some ideas:

• Loading up my SUV with fabric and paint swatches and drive around neighborhoods with signage advertising instant decorating services. Business card will read, "HAVE SWATCHES WILL TRAVEL"; D&D on wheels.
• Call John Beresford Tipton and wait for a visit from Mike (this will date you, if you don’t understand ask your parents)
• A Decorating Ponzi scheme
• Sell bogus memberships in the Hall of Fame
• Do a Tonya Harding on Michael Smith
• Take style enhancing steroids
• Start a new reality show "Decorating With The Stars"