Paul Siskin

Septic Supreme

So sorry for the long absence, but a friend’s house unfortunately burnt down and I have been helping her with an inventory for the insurance company. Very time consuming! It’s bad enough that she is a collector (not only art but of just about everything), but she also lives in a house measuring over 12,000 square feet. This combination makes for a true test of friendship.

Back to my house…building a house has always been a dream of mine. However, these dreams never included the idea of having the biggest and greatest septic system in the neighborhood. Well, it has come to pass that this is what I am going to have. Please try to conceal your envy. I have just heard from contractor Mitch, and for reasons I do not fully understand, my system will end up costing $35,000.00. Needless to say, this is not the place I was planning to put my money. Due to the topography, the building department and who knows what else, I will need a double system. Note to all future guests: Do not give a moment’s concern to using the plumbing. I should be covered for all emergencies. I will rest much easier now.

But there is progress and I will get pictures when I go this week. Due to the septic price increase I will have to postpone a few extras for a while. There will be plenty of bare light bulbs; it will be winter so you will never notice the lack of greenery outside; just pretend the kitchen counter is granite painted to look like plywood; and if the furniture looks a little familiar, it is. WASPS have been doing it for years, a few chintz slip covers and Brokeback Manor will look just that, a manor house in the country.

Question for the day: how did decorators ever make a living in pre-war England? Something to think about and I will be back at you next week.

Posted by Paul Siskin on October 14, 2009 | Comments (1)